It was a great time recently as I was honored to take part in my sisters wedding. As I sat through the ceremony I could not stop thinking about the importance of the covenant that is made on this day. All of us who are married have taken the same responsibilities on in our lives. But are we really honoring our wives and upholding those commitments?

Whatever version of Love, Honor and Cherish till death do us part that you committed to, it is the same responsibility Jesus took on when he came to earth for His bride, the church. It is critical that we uphold these covenant values. That we be present in our marriages and not neglect some critical areas because we are not comfortable with the thought of being vulnerable and sharing our feelings. Don’t get me wrong guys, I am not that touchy, feeley oversensitive type personality, but I have realized the importance behind making sure that my wife knows what I am thinking and feeling. Explain why things upset you. Hey even consider speaking up when things hurt your feelings or you feel like your character was just assaulted. This things may not make sense to your wife, but it may if you take the time to explain it. This can only prove to create unity and allow you both to dwell in an understanding manner and honor each other as we are told in 1 Peter 3:7

We are to love our wives unconditionally and do all we can to live in peace and unity with her. Romans 12:18 says “if possible, so far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.” Yes, that includes spouses and children, in-laws and everyone else!

First off, love is not a feeling it is a choice!

My wife and I understand that there are times we may not like each other but there will never be a day that we do not love each other. All to often we base our feelings towards our spouses on what they have done instead of who they are. This is unfair and completely against everything that the Bible teaches. Make a decision today to choose to love your wife with the unconditional love that God has for us. After all, we are to be the example of Christ in our marriages.

Honor is a whole other topic. There are so many ways that we dishonor our wives without even realizing it, the list could be endless. It is not an intentional thing, but it is still harmful and hurtful to her and destructive to the covenant of marriage.
– How we speak to her
– How we speak to others about her and your marriage
– Being dismissive
– Not acknowledging her concerns
– Not being supportive of her
– Not encouraging her to pursue her dreams and helping her in any way needed

Men, please understand that you have the responsibility for how your marriage is going right now. If you do not like where it is going, it is probably time you think about how you can be a positive influence in challenging situations. Are the challenges you are facing your fault? Maybe not, but it is not about fault. It is about you stepping up and being the strong leader that your wife and children need you to be and that God has called you to be. Step up and you will see a difference in short order.

Check out the Resources tab for some different blogs, books and resources that you can tap into and begin making a difference. You are the hero that your marriage and family needs. If your marriage or relationship is in a proverbial ditch, you are the one to pull it out! If your marriage is doing well, it can always be better!

Feel free to comment, like and share. I would love to hear your thoughts on this.